shi-no-toge:

hanakotobawakodoku:

Entirely unaware that he had an audience, Eric kept it up. His movements were fluid, hips inspired to sway with the music and feet bouncing against the bed in time. Yes, he was the sort to go about dancing on his bed. And while he wasn’t bad at it, it seemed his balance needed a little work — for one wrong step and he was sent (in a fit of loud shouts and cursing) tumbling to the ground with a crash. Sheets tangled around his legs and hair disheveled.

“I just d-don’t understand why y-you’d be so wonderful to me a-and then pretend n-none of it happened.” he cried. “All I wanted was for you to care for m-me as much as I-I care for you…” His breathing was slowly evening out and his cries were softer. He was limp against the other man, energy dwindling. “I love you… I just wanted you t-to love me.” he managed to say, small frame trembling. “B-but you could n-never… because I’m dying… ”

“I know.” Eric could scarcely stand to hear it all. He wanted to confess that he did care a great deal for Alan – that he always had. He wanted to kiss him, and stroke his cheeks and his hair. Compliment him. Comfort him. Love him. But he did none of those things. 

But it was when Alan said that it was because he was dying that Eric faltered. “Wh- … Wha’?” That again! Where had he gotten a thought like that? “Tha’s no’ true!"